Skip to content
On this page

Spirits in Bondage, by (AKA Clive Hamilton) C. S. Lewis

Title: Spirits in Bondage

Author: (AKA Clive Hamilton) C. S. Lewis

Posting Date: November 7, 2008 [EBook #2003] Release Date: December, 1999

*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SPIRITS IN BONDAGE ***

Produced by An Anonymous Volunteer

SPIRITS IN BONDAGE

A CYCLE OF LYRICS

By Clive Hamilton [C. S. Lewis]

In Three Parts

 I.    The Prison House
 II.   Hesitation
 III.The Escape


      "The land where I shall never be
      The love that I shall never see"

Historical Background

Published under the pseudonym, Clive Hamilton, Spirits in Bondage was C. S. Lewis' first book. Released in 1919 by Heinemann, it was reprinted in 1984 by Harcourt Brace Jovanovich and included in Lewis' 1994 Collected Poems. It is the first of Lewis' major published works to enter the public domain in the United States. Readers should be aware that in other countries it may still be under copyright protection.

Most of the poems appear to have been written between 1915 and 1918, a period during which Lewis was a student under W. T. Kirkpatrick, a military trainee at Oxford, and a soldier serving in the trenches of World War I. Their outlook varies from Romantic expressions of love for the beauty and simplicity of nature to cynical statements about the presence of evil in this world. In a September 12, 1918 letter to his friend Arthur Greeves, Lewis said that his book was, "mainly strung around the idea that I mentioned to you before--that nature is wholly diabolical & malevolent and that God, if he exists, is outside of and in opposition to the cosmic arrangements." In his cynical poems, Lewis is dealing with the same questions about evil in nature that Alfred Lord Tennyson explored from a position of troubled faith in "In Memoriam A. H." (Stanzas 54f). In a letter written perhaps to reassure his father, Lewis claimed, "You know who the God I blaspheme is and that it is not the God that you or I worship, or any other Christian."

Whatever Lewis believed at that time, the attitude in many of these poems is quite different from the attitude he expressed in his many Christian books from the 1930s on. Attempts in movies and on stage plays to portray Lewis as a sheltered professor who knew little about pain until the death of his wife late in life, have to deal not only with the many tragedies he experienced from a boy on, but also with the disturbing issues he faced in many of these early poems.

Prologue

 As of old Phoenician men, to the Tin Isles sailing
 Straight against the sunset and the edges of the earth,
 Chaunted loud above the storm and the strange sea's wailing,
 Legends of their people and the land that gave them birth--
 Sang aloud to Baal-Peor, sang unto the horned maiden,
 Sang how they should come again with the Brethon treasure laden,
 Sang of all the pride and glory of their hardy enterprise,
 How they found the outer islands, where the unknown stars arise;
 And the rowers down below, rowing hard as they could row,
 Toiling at the stroke and feather through the wet and weary weather,
 Even they forgot their burden in the measure of a song,
 And the merchants and the masters and the bondsmen all together,
 Dreaming of the wondrous islands, brought the gallant ship along;
 So in mighty deeps alone on the chainless breezes blown
 In my coracle of verses I will sing of lands unknown,
 Flying from the scarlet city where a Lord that knows no pity,
 Mocks the broken people praying round his iron throne,
 Sing about the Hidden Country fresh and full of quiet green.
 Sailing over seas uncharted to a port that none has seen.

Part I The Prison House

I. Satan Speaks

 I am Nature, the Mighty Mother,
 I am the law: ye have none other.

 I am the flower and the dewdrop fresh,
 I am the lust in your itching flesh.

 I am the battle's filth and strain,
 I am the widow's empty pain.

 I am the sea to smother your breath,
 I am the bomb, the falling death.

 I am the fact and the crushing reason
 To thwart your fantasy's new-born treason.

 I am the spider making her net,
 I am the beast with jaws blood-wet.

 I am a wolf that follows the sun
 And I will catch him ere day be done.

II. French Nocturne (Monchy-Le-Preux)

 Long leagues on either hand the trenches spread
 And all is still; now even this gross line
 Drinks in the frosty silences divine
 The pale, green moon is riding overhead.

 The jaws of a sacked village, stark and grim;
 Out on the ridge have swallowed up the sun,
 And in one angry streak his blood has run
 To left and right along the horizon dim.

 There comes a buzzing plane: and now, it seems
 Flies straight into the moon. Lo! where he steers
 Across the pallid globe and surely nears
 In that white land some harbour of dear dreams!

 False mocking fancy! Once I too could dream,
 Who now can only see with vulgar eye
 That he's no nearer to the moon than I
 And she's a stone that catches the sun's beam.

 What call have I to dream of anything?
 I am a wolf. Back to the world again,
 And speech of fellow-brutes that once were men
 Our throats can bark for slaughter: cannot sing.

III. The Satyr

 When the flowery hands of spring
 Forth their woodland riches fling,
   Through the meadows, through the valleys
 Goes the satyr carolling.

 From the mountain and the moor,
 Forest green and ocean shore
   All the faerie kin he rallies
 Making music evermore.

 See! the shaggy pelt doth grow
 On his twisted shanks below,
   And his dreadful feet are cloven
 Though his brow be white as snow--

 Though his brow be clear and white
 And beneath it fancies bright,
   Wisdom and high thoughts are woven
 And the musics of delight,

 Though his temples too be fair
 Yet two horns are growing there
   Bursting forth to part asunder
 All the riches of his hair.

 Faerie maidens he may meet
 Fly the horns and cloven feet,
   But, his sad brown eyes with wonder
 Seeing-stay from their retreat.

IV. Victory

 Roland is dead, Cuchulain's crest is low,
 The battered war-rear wastes and turns to rust,
 And Helen's eyes and Iseult's lips are dust
 And dust the shoulders and the breasts of snow.

 The faerie people from our woods are gone,
 No Dryads have I found in all our trees,
 No Triton blows his horn about our seas
 And Arthur sleeps far hence in Avalon.

 The ancient songs they wither as the grass
 And waste as doth a garment waxen old,
 All poets have been fools who thought to mould
 A monument more durable than brass.

 For these decay: but not for that decays
 The yearning, high, rebellious spirit of man
 That never rested yet since life began
 From striving with red Nature and her ways.

 Now in the filth of war, the baresark shout
 Of battle, it is vexed. And yet so oft
 Out of the deeps, of old, it rose aloft
 That they who watch the ages may not doubt.

 Though often bruised, oft broken by the rod,
 Yet, like the phoenix, from each fiery bed
 Higher the stricken spirit lifts its head
 And higher-till the beast become a god.

V. Irish Nocturne

 Now the grey mist comes creeping up
 From the waste ocean's weedy strand
 And fills the valley, as a cup
 If filled of evil drink in a wizard's hand;
 And the trees fade out of sight,
 Like dreary ghosts unhealthily,
 Into the damp, pale night,
 Till you almost think that a clearer eye could see
 Some shape come up of a demon seeking apart
 His meat, as Grendel sought in Harte
 The thanes that sat by the wintry log--
 Grendel or the shadowy mass
 Of Balor, or the man with the face of clay,
 The grey, grey walker who used to pass
 Over the rock-arch nightly to his prey.
 But here at the dumb, slow stream where the willows hang,
 With never a wind to blow the mists apart,
 Bitter and bitter it is for thee. O my heart,
 Looking upon this land, where poets sang,
 Thus with the dreary shroud
 Unwholesome, over it spread,
 And knowing the fog and the cloud
 In her people's heart and head
 Even as it lies for ever upon her coasts
 Making them dim and dreamy lest her sons should ever arise
 And remember all their boasts;
 For I know that the colourless skies
 And the blurred horizons breed
 Lonely desire and many words and brooding and never a deed.

VI. Spooks

 Last night I dreamed that I was come again
 Unto the house where my beloved dwells
 After long years of wandering and pain.

 And I stood out beneath the drenching rain
 And all the street was bare, and black with night,
 But in my true love's house was warmth and light.

 Yet I could not draw near nor enter in,
 And long I wondered if some secret sin
 Or old, unhappy anger held me fast;

 Till suddenly it came into my head
 That I was killed long since and lying dead--
 Only a homeless wraith that way had passed.

 So thus I found my true love's house again
 And stood unseen amid the winter night
 And the lamp burned within, a rosy light,
 And the wet street was shining in the rain.

VII. Apology

 If men should ask, Despoina, why I tell
 Of nothing glad nor noble in my verse
 To lighten hearts beneath this present curse
 And build a heaven of dreams in real hell,

 Go you to them and speak among them thus:
 "There were no greater grief than to recall,
 Down in the rotting grave where the lithe worms crawl,
 Green fields above that smiled so sweet to us."

 Is it good to tell old tales of Troynovant
 Or praises of dead heroes, tried and sage,
 Or sing the queens of unforgotten age,
 Brynhild and Maeve and virgin Bradamant?

 How should I sing of them? Can it be good
 To think of glory now, when all is done,
 And all our labour underneath the sun
 Has brought us this-and not the thing we would?

 All these were rosy visions of the night,
 The loveliness and wisdom feigned of old.
 But now we wake. The East is pale and cold,
 No hope is in the dawn, and no delight.

VIII. Ode for New Year's Day

 Woe unto you, ye sons of pain that are this day in earth,
 Now cry for all your torment: now curse your hour of birth
 And the fathers who begat you to a portion nothing worth.
 And Thou, my own beloved, for as brave as ere thou art,
 Bow down thine head, Despoina, clasp thy pale arms over it,
 Lie low with fast-closed eyelids, clenched teeth, enduring heart,
 For sorrow on sorrow is coming wherein all flesh has part.
 The sky above is sickening, the clouds of God's hate cover it,
 Body and soul shall suffer beyond all word or thought,
 Till the pain and noisy terror that these first years have wrought
 Seem but the soft arising and prelude of the storm
 That fiercer still and heavier with sharper lightnings fraught
 Shall pour red wrath upon us over a world deform.

 Thrice happy, O Despoina, were the men who were alive
 In the great age and the golden age when still the cycle ran
 On upward curve and easily, for them both maid and man
 And beast and tree and spirit in the green earth could thrive.
 But now one age is ending, and God calls home the stars
 And looses the wheel of the ages and sends it spinning back
 Amid the death of nations, and points a downward track,
 And madness is come over us and great and little wars.
 He has not left one valley, one isle of fresh and green
 Where old friends could forgather amid the howling wreck.
 It's vainly we are praying. We cannot, cannot check
 The Power who slays and puts aside the beauty that has been.

 It's truth they tell, Despoina, none hears the heart's complaining
 For Nature will not pity, nor the red God lend an ear,
 Yet I too have been mad in the hour of bitter paining
 And lifted up my voice to God, thinking that he could hear
 The curse wherewith I cursed Him because the Good was dead.
 But lo! I am grown wiser, knowing that our own hearts
 Have made a phantom called the Good, while a few years have sped
 Over a little planet. And what should the great Lord know of it
 Who tosses the dust of chaos and gives the suns their parts?
 Hither and thither he moves them; for an hour we see the show of it:
 Only a little hour, and the life of the race is done.
 And here he builds a nebula, and there he slays a sun
 And works his own fierce pleasure. All things he shall fulfill,
 And O, my poor Despoina, do you think he ever hears
 The wail of hearts he has broken, the sound of human ill?
 He cares not for our virtues, our little hopes and fears,
 And how could it all go on, love, if he knew of laughter and tears?

 Ah, sweet, if a man could cheat him! If you could flee away
 Into some other country beyond the rosy West,
 To hide in the deep forests and be for ever at rest
 From the rankling hate of God and the outworn world's decay!

IX. Night

 After the fret and failure of this day,
 And weariness of thought, O Mother Night,
 Come with soft kiss to soothe our care away
 And all our little tumults set to right;
 Most pitiful of all death's kindred fair,
 Riding above us through the curtained air
 On thy dusk car, thou scatterest to the earth
 Sweet dreams and drowsy charms of tender might
 And lovers' dear delight before to-morrow's birth.
 Thus art thou wont thy quiet lands to leave
 And pillared courts beyond the Milky Way,
 Wherein thou tarriest all our solar day
 While unsubstantial dreams before thee weave
 A foamy dance, and fluttering fancies play
 About thy palace in the silver ray
 Of some far, moony globe. But when the hour,
 The long-expected comes, the ivory gates
 Open on noiseless hinge before thy bower
 Unbidden, and the jewelled chariot waits
 With magic steeds. Thou from the fronting rim
 Bending to urge them, whilst thy sea-dark hair
 Falls in ambrosial ripples o'er each limb,
 With beautiful pale arms, untrammelled, bare
 For horsemanship, to those twin chargers fleet
 Dost give full rein across the fires that glow
 In the wide floor of heaven, from off their feet
 Scattering the powdery star-dust as they go.
 Come swiftly down the sky, O Lady Night,
 Fall through the shadow-country, O most kind,
 Shake out thy strands of gentle dreams and light
 For chains, wherewith thou still art used to bind
 With tenderest love of careful leeches' art
 The bruised and weary heart
 In slumber blind.

X. To Sleep

 I will find out a place for thee, O Sleep--
 A hidden wood among the hill-tops green,
 Full of soft streams and little winds that creep
   The murmuring boughs between.

 A hollow cup above the ocean placed
 Where nothing rough, nor loud, nor harsh shall be,
 But woodland light and shadow interlaced
   And summer sky and sea.

 There in the fragrant twilight I will raise
 A secret altar of the rich sea sod,
 Whereat to offer sacrifice and praise
   Unto my lonely god:

 Due sacrifice of his own drowsy flowers,
 The deadening poppies in an ocean shell
 Round which through all forgotten days and hours
   The great seas wove their spell.

 So may he send me dreams of dear delight
 And draughts of cool oblivion, quenching pain,
 And sweet, half-wakeful moments in the night
   To hear the falling rain.

 And when he meets me at the dusk of day
 To call me home for ever, this I ask--
 That he may lead me friendly on that way
   And wear no frightful mask.

XI. In Prison

 I cried out for the pain of man,
 I cried out for my bitter wrath
 Against the hopeless life that ran
 For ever in a circling path
 From death to death since all began;
 Till on a summer night
 I lost my way in the pale starlight
 And saw our planet, far and small,
 Through endless depths of nothing fall
 A lonely pin-prick spark of light,
 Upon the wide, enfolding night,
 With leagues on leagues of stars above it,
 And powdered dust of stars below--
 Dead things that neither hate nor love it
 Not even their own loveliness can know,
 Being but cosmic dust and dead.
 And if some tears be shed,
 Some evil God have power,
 Some crown of sorrow sit
 Upon a little world for a little hour--
 Who shall remember? Who shall care for it?

XII. De Profundis

 Come let us curse our Master ere we die,
 For all our hopes in endless ruin lie.
 The good is dead. Let us curse God most High.

 Four thousand years of toil and hope and thought
 Wherein man laboured upward and still wrought
 New worlds and better, Thou hast made as naught.

 We built us joyful cities, strong and fair,
 Knowledge we sought and gathered wisdom rare.
 And all this time you laughed upon our care,

 And suddenly the earth grew black with wrong,
 Our hope was crushed and silenced was our song,
 The heaven grew loud with weeping. Thou art strong.

 Come then and curse the Lord. Over the earth
 Gross darkness falls, and evil was our birth
 And our few happy days of little worth.

 Even if it be not all a dream in vain
 The ancient hope that still will rise again--
 Of a just God that cares for earthly pain,

 Yet far away beyond our labouring night,
 He wanders in the depths of endless light,
 Singing alone his musics of delight;

 Only the far, spent echo of his song
 Our dungeons and deep cells can smite along,
 And Thou art nearer. Thou art very strong.

 O universal strength, I know it well,
 It is but froth of folly to rebel;
 For thou art Lord and hast the keys of Hell.

 Yet I will not bow down to thee nor love thee,
 For looking in my own heart I can prove thee,
 And know this frail, bruised being is above thee.

 Our love, our hope, our thirsting for the right,
 Our mercy and long seeking of the light,
 Shall we change these for thy relentless might?

 Laugh then and slay. Shatter all things of worth,
 Heap torment still on torment for thy mirth--
 Thou art not Lord while there are Men on earth.

XIII. Satan Speaks

 I am the Lord your God: even he that made
 Material things, and all these signs arrayed
 Above you and have set beneath the race
 Of mankind, who forget their Father's face
 And even while they drink my light of day
 Dream of some other gods and disobey
 My warnings, and despise my holy laws,
 Even tho' their sin shall slay them. For which cause,
 Dreams dreamed in vain, a never-filled desire
 And in close flesh a spiritual fire,
 A thirst for good their kind shall not attain,
 A backward cleaving to the beast again.
 A loathing for the life that I have given,
 A haunted, twisted soul for ever riven
 Between their will and mine-such lot I give
 White still in my despite the vermin live.
 They hate my world! Then let that other God
 Come from the outer spaces glory-shod,
 And from this castle I have built on Night
 Steal forth my own thought's children into light,
 If such an one there be. But far away
 He walks the airy fields of endless day,
 And my rebellious sons have called Him long
 And vainly called. My order still is strong
 And like to me nor second none I know.
 Whither the mammoth went this creature too shall go.

XIV. The Witch

 Trapped amid the woods with guile
 They've led her bound in fetters vile
 To death, a deadlier sorceress
 Than any born for earth's distress
 Since first the winner of the fleece
 Bore home the Colchian witch to Greece--
 Seven months with snare and gin
 They've sought the maid o'erwise within
 The forest's labyrinthine shade.
 The lonely woodman half afraid
 Far off her ragged form has seen
 Sauntering down the alleys green,
 Or crouched in godless prayer alone
 At eve before a Druid stone.
 But now the bitter chase is won,
 The quarry's caught, her magic's done,
 The bishop's brought her strongest spell
 To naught with candle, book, and bell;
 With holy water splashed upon her,
 She goes to burning and dishonour
 Too deeply damned to feel her shame,
 For, though beneath her hair of flame
 Her thoughtful head be lowly bowed
 It droops for meditation proud
 Impenitent, and pondering yet
 Things no memory can forget,
 Starry wonders she has seen
 Brooding in the wildwood green
 With holiness. For who can say
 In what strange crew she loved to play,
 What demons or what gods of old
 Deep mysteries unto her have told
 At dead of night in worship bent
 At ruined shrines magnificent,
 Or how the quivering will she sent
 Alone into the great alone
 Where all is loved and all is known,
 Who now lifts up her maiden eyes
 And looks around with soft surprise
 Upon the noisy, crowded square,
 The city oafs that nod and stare,
 The bishop's court that gathers there,
 The faggots and the blackened stake
 Where sinners die for justice' sake?
 Now she is set upon the pile,
 The mob grows still a little while,
 Till lo! before the eager folk
 Up curls a thin, blue line of smoke.
 "Alas!" the full-fed burghers cry,
 "That evil loveliness must die!"

XV. Dungeon Grates

 So piteously the lonely soul of man
 Shudders before this universal plan,
 So grievous is the burden and the pain,
 So heavy weighs the long, material chain
 From cause to cause, too merciless for hate,
 The nightmare march of unrelenting fate,
 I think that he must die thereof unless
 Ever and again across the dreariness
 There came a sudden glimpse of spirit faces,
 A fragrant breath to tell of flowery places
 And wider oceans, breaking on the shore
 From which the hearts of men are always sore.
 It lies beyond endeavour; neither prayer
 Nor fasting, nor much wisdom winneth there,
 Seeing how many prophets and wise men
 Have sought for it and still returned again
 With hope undone. But only the strange power
 Of unsought Beauty in some casual hour
 Can build a bridge of light or sound or form
 To lead you out of all this strife and storm;
 When of some beauty we are grown a part
 Till from its very glory's midmost heart
 Out leaps a sudden beam of larger light
 Into our souls. All things are seen aright
 Amid the blinding pillar of its gold,
 Seven times more true than what for truth we hold
 In vulgar hours. The miracle is done
 And for one little moment we are one
 With the eternal stream of loveliness
 That flows so calm, aloft from all distress
 Yet leaps and lives around us as a fire
 Making us faint with overstrong desire
 To sport and swim for ever in its deep--
 Only a moment.
                       O! but we shall keep
 Our vision still. One moment was enough,
 We know we are not made of mortal stuff.
 And we can bear all trials that come after,
 The hate of men and the fool's loud bestial laughter
 And Nature's rule and cruelties unclean,
 For we have seen the Glory-we have seen.

XVI. The Philosopher

 Who shall be our prophet then,
 Chosen from all the sons of men
 To lead his fellows on the way
 Of hidden knowledge, delving deep
 To nameless mysteries that keep
 Their secret from the solar day!
 Or who shall pierce with surer eye!
 This shifting veil of bittersweet
 And find the real things that lie
 Beyond this turmoil, which we greet
 With such a wasted wealth of tears?
 Who shall cross over for us the bridge of fears
 And pass in to the country where the ancient Mothers dwell?
 Is it an elder, bent and hoar
 Who, where the waste Atlantic swell
 On lonely beaches makes its roar,
 In his solitary tower
 Through the long night hour by hour
 Pores on old books with watery eye
 When all his youth has passed him by,
 And folly is schooled and love is dead
 And frozen fancy laid abed,
 While in his veins the gradual blood
 Slackens to a marish flood?
 For he rejoiceth not in the ocean's might,
 Neither the sun giveth delight,
 Nor the moon by night
 Shall call his feet to wander in the haunted forest lawn.
 He shall no more rise suddenly in the dawn
 When mists are white and the dew lies pearly
 Cold and cold on every meadow,
 To take his joy of the season early,
 The opening flower and the westward shadow,
 And scarcely can he dream of laughter and love,
 They lie so many leaden years behind.
 Such eyes are dim and blind,
 And the sad, aching head that nods above
 His monstrous books can never know
 The secret we would find.
 But let our seer be young and kind
 And fresh and beautiful of show,
 And taken ere the lustyhead
 And rapture of his youth be dead;
 Ere the gnawing, peasant reason
 School him over-deep in treason
 To the ancient high estate
 Of his fancy's principate,
 That he may live a perfect whole,
 A mask of the eternal soul,
 And cross at last the shadowy bar
 To where the ever-living are.

XVII. The Ocean Strand

 O leave the labouring roadways of the town,
 The shifting faces and the changeful hue
 Of markets, and broad echoing streets that drown
 The heart's own silent music. Though they too
 Sing in their proper rhythm, and still delight
 The friendly ear that loves warm human kind,
 Yet it is good to leave them all behind,
 Now when from lily dawn to purple night
 Summer is queen,
 Summer is queen in all the happy land.
 Far, far away among the valleys green
 Let us go forth and wander hand in hand
 Beyond those solemn hills that we have seen
 So often welcome home the falling sun
 Into their cloudy peaks when day was done--
 Beyond them till we find the ocean strand
 And hear the great waves run,
 With the waste song whose melodies I'd follow
 And weary not for many a summer day,
 Born of the vaulted breakers arching hollow
 Before they flash and scatter into spray,
 On, if we should be weary of their play
 Then I would lead you further into land
 Where, with their ragged walls, the stately rocks
 Shunt in smooth courts and paved with quiet sand
 To silence dedicate. The sea-god's flocks
 Have rested here, and mortal eyes have seen
 By great adventure at the dead of noon
 A lonely nereid drowsing half a-swoon
 Buried beneath her dark and dripping locks.

XVIII. Noon

 Noon! and in the garden bower
 The hot air quivers o'er the grass,
 The little lake is smooth as glass
 And still so heavily the hour
 Drags, that scarce the proudest flower
 Pressed upon its burning bed
 Has strength to lift a languid head:--
 Rose and fainting violet
 By the water's margin set
 Swoon and sink as they were dead
 Though their weary leaves be fed
 With the foam-drops of the pool
 Where it trembles dark and cool
 Wrinkled by the fountain spraying
 O'er it. And the honey-bee
 Hums his drowsy melody
 And wanders in his course a-straying
 Through the sweet and tangled glade
 With his golden mead o'erladen,
 Where beneath the pleasant shade
 Of the darkling boughs a maiden--
 Milky limb and fiery tress,
 All at sweetest random laid--
 Slumbers, drunken with the excess
 Of the noontide's loveliness.

XIX. Milton Read Again (In Surrey)

 Three golden months while summer on us stole
 I have read your joyful tale another time,
 Breathing more freely in that larger clime
 And learning wiselier to deserve the whole.

 Your Spirit, Master, has been close at hand
 And guided me, still pointing treasures rare,
 Thick-sown where I before saw nothing fair
 And finding waters in the barren land,

 Barren once thought because my eyes were dim.
 Like one I am grown to whom the common field
 And often-wandered copse one morning yield
 New pleasures suddenly; for over him

 Falls the weird spirit of unexplained delight,
 New mystery in every shady place,
 In every whispering tree a nameless grace,
 New rapture on the windy seaward height.

 So may she come to me, teaching me well
 To savour all these sweets that lie to hand
 In wood and lane about this pleasant land
 Though it be not the land where I would dwell.

 .
 XX. Sonnet

 The stars come out; the fragrant shadows fall
 About a dreaming garden still and sweet,
 I hear the unseen bats above me bleat
 Among the ghostly moths their hunting call,
 And twinkling glow-worms all about me crawl.
 Now for a chamber dim, a pillow meet
 For slumbers deep as death, a faultless sheet,
 Cool, white and smooth. So may I reach the hall
 With poppies strewn where sleep that is so dear
 With magic sponge can wipe away an hour
 Or twelve and make them naught. Why not a year,
 Why could a man not loiter in that bower
 Until a thousand painless cycles wore,
 And then-what if it held him evermore?

XXI. The Autumn Morning

 See! the pale autumn dawn
 Is faint, upon the lawn
   That lies in powdered white
       Of hoar-frost dight

 And now from tree to tree
 The ghostly mist we see
   Hung like a silver pall
       To hallow all.

 It wreathes the burdened air
 So strangely everywhere
   That I could almost fear
       This silence drear

 Where no one song-bird sings
 And dream that wizard things
   Mighty for hate or love
       Were close above.

 White as the fog and fair
 Drifting through the middle air
   In magic dances dread
       Over my head.

 Yet these should know me too
 Lover and bondman true,
   One that has honoured well
       The mystic spell

 Of earth's most solemn hours
 Wherein the ancient powers
   Of dryad, elf, or faun
       Or leprechaun

 Oft have their faces shown
 To me that walked alone
   Seashore or haunted fen
       Or mountain glen

 Wherefore I will not fear
 To walk the woodlands sere
   Into this autumn day
       Far, far away.

Part II Hesitation

 XXII. L'Apprenti Sorcier

 Suddenly there came to me
 The music of a mighty sea
 That on a bare and iron shore
 Thundered with a deeper roar
 Than all the tides that leap and run
 With us below the real sun:
 Because the place was far away,
 Above, beyond our homely day,
 Neighbouring close the frozen clime
 Where out of all the woods of time,
 Amid the frightful seraphim
 The fierce, cold eyes of Godhead gleam,
 Revolving hate and misery
 And wars and famines yet to be.
 And in my dreams I stood alone
 Upon a shelf of weedy stone,
 And saw before my shrinking eyes
 The dark, enormous breakers rise,
 And hover and fall with deafening thunder
 Of thwarted foam that echoed under
 The ledge, through many a cavern drear,
 With hollow sounds of wintry fear.
 And through the waters waste and grey,
 Thick-strown for many a league away,
 Out of the toiling sea arose
 Many a face and form of those
 Thin, elemental people dear
 Who live beyond our heavy sphere.
 And all at once from far and near,
 They all held out their arms to me,
 Crying in their melody,
 "Leap in! Leap in and take thy fill
 Of all the cosmic good and ill,
 Be as the Living ones that know
 Enormous joy, enormous woe,
 Pain beyond thought and fiery bliss:
 For all thy study hunted this,
 On wings of magic to arise,
 And wash from off thy filmed eyes
 The cloud of cold mortality,
 To find the real life and be
 As are the children of the deep!
 Be bold and dare the glorious leap,
 Or to thy shame, go, slink again
 Back to the narrow ways of men."
 So all these mocked me as I stood
 Striving to wake because I feared the flood.

XXIII. Alexandrines

 There is a house that most of all on earth I hate.
 Though I have passed through many sorrows and have been
 In bloody fields, sad seas, and countries desolate,
 Yet most I fear that empty house where the grasses green
 Grow in the silent court the gaping flags between,
 And down the moss-grown paths and terrace no man treads
 Where the old, old weeds rise deep on the waste garden beds.
 Like eyes of one long dead the empty windows stare
 And I fear to cross the garden, I fear to linger there,
 For in that house I know a little, silent room
 Where Someone's always waiting, waiting in the gloom
 To draw me with an evil eye, and hold me fast--
 Yet thither doom will drive me and He will win at last.

XXIV. In Praise of Solid People

 Thank God that there are solid folk
 Who water flowers and roll the lawn,
 And sit an sew and talk and smoke,
 And snore all through the summer dawn.

 Who pass untroubled nights and days
 Full-fed and sleepily content,
 Rejoicing in each other's praise,
 Respectable and innocent.

 Who feel the things that all men feel,
 And think in well-worn grooves of thought,
 Whose honest spirits never reel
 Before man's mystery, overwrought.

 Yet not unfaithful nor unkind,
 with work-day virtues surely staid,
 Theirs is the sane and humble mind,
 And dull affections undismayed.

 O happy people! I have seen
 No verse yet written in your praise,
 And, truth to tell, the time has been
 I would have scorned your easy ways.

 But now thro' weariness and strife
 I learn your worthiness indeed,
 The world is better for such life
 As stout suburban people lead.

 Too often have I sat alone
 When the wet night falls heavily,
 And fretting winds around me moan,
 And homeless longing vexes me

 For lore that I shall never know,
 And visions none can hope to see,
 Till brooding works upon me so
 A childish fear steals over me.

 I look around the empty room,
 The clock still ticking in its place,
 And all else silent as the tomb,
 Till suddenly, I think, a face

 Grows from the darkness just beside.
 I turn, and lo! it fades away,
 And soon another phantom tide
 Of shifting dreams begins to play,

 And dusky galleys past me sail,
 Full freighted on a faerie sea;
 I hear the silken merchants hail
 Across the ringing waves to me

 --Then suddenly, again, the room,
 Familiar books about me piled,
 And I alone amid the gloom,
 By one more mocking dream beguiled.

 And still no neared to the Light,
 And still no further from myself,
 Alone and lost in clinging night--
 (The clock's still ticking on the shelf).

 Then do I envy solid folk
 Who sit of evenings by the fire,
 After their work and doze and smoke,
 And are not fretted by desire.

Part III The Escape

 XXV. Song of the Pilgrims

 O Dwellers at the back of the North Wind,
 What have we done to you? How have we sinned
 Wandering the Earth from Orkney unto Ind?

 With many deaths our fellowship is thinned,
 Our flesh is withered in the parching wind,
 Wandering the earth from Orkney unto Ind.

 We have no rest. We cannot turn again
 Back to the world and all her fruitless pain,
 Having once sought the land where ye remain.

 Some say ye are not. But, ah God! we know
 That somewhere, somewhere past the Northern snow
 Waiting for us the red-rose gardens blow:

 --The red-rose and the white-rose gardens blow
 In the green Northern land to which we go,
 Surely the ways are long and the years are slow.

 We have forsaken all things sweet and fair,
 We have found nothing worth a moment's care
 Because the real flowers are blowing there.

 Land of the Lotus fallen from the sun,
 Land of the Lake from whence all rivers run,
 Land where the hope of all our dreams is won!

 Shall we not somewhere see at close of day
 The green walls of that country far away,
 And hear the music of her fountains play?

 So long we have been wandering all this while
 By many a perilous sea and drifting isle,
 We scarce shall dare to look thereon and smile.

 Yea, when we are drawing very near to thee,
 And when at last the ivory port we see
 Our hearts will faint with mere felicity:

 But we shall wake again in gardens bright
 Of green and gold for infinite delight,
 Sleeping beneath the solemn mountains white,
 While from the flowery copses still unseen
 Sing out the crooning birds that ne'er have been
 Touched by the hand of winter frore and lean;

 And ever living queens that grow not old
 And poets wise in robes of faerie gold
 Whisper a wild, sweet song that first was told

 Ere God sat down to make the Milky Way.
 And in those gardens we shall sleep and play
 For ever and for ever and a day.

 Ah, Dwellers at the back of the North Wind,
 What have we done to you? How have we sinned,
 That yes should hide beyond the Northern wind?

 Land of the Lotus, fallen from the Sun,
 When shall your hidden, flowery vales be won
 And all the travail of our way be done?

 Very far we have searched; we have even seen
 The Scythian waste that bears no soft nor green,
 And near the Hideous Pass our feet have been.

 We have heard Syrens singing all night long
 Beneath the unknown stars their lonely song
 In friendless seas beyond the Pillars strong.

 Nor by the dragon-daughter of Hypocras
 Nor the vale of the Devil's head we have feared to pass,
 Yet is our labour lost and vain, alas!

 Scouring the earth from Orkney unto Ind,
 Tossed on the seas and withered in the wind,
 We seek and seek your land. How have we sinned?

 Or is it all a folly of the wise,
 Bidding us walk these ways with blinded eyes
 While all around us real flowers arise?

 But, by the very God, we know, we know
 That somewhere still, beyond the Northern snow
 Waiting for us the red-rose gardens blow.

XXVI. Song

 Faeries must be in the woods
 Or the satyrs' laughing broods--
 Tritons in the summer sea,
 Else how could the dead things be
 Half so lovely as they are?
 How could wealth of star on star
 Dusted o'er the frosty night
 Fill thy spirit with delight
 And lead thee from this care of thine
 Up among the dreams divine,
 Were it not that each and all
 Of them that walk the heavenly hall
 Is in truth a happy isle,
 Where eternal meadows smile,
 And golden globes of fruit are seen
 Twinkling through the orchards green;
 Were the Other People go
 On the bright sward to and fro?
 Atoms dead could never thus
 Stir the human heart of us
 Unless the beauty that we see
 The veil of endless beauty be,
 Filled full of spirits that have trod
 Far hence along the heavenly sod
 And see the bright footprints of God.

XXVII. The Ass

 I woke and rose and slipt away
 To the heathery hills in the morning grey.

 In a field where the dew lay cold and deep
 I met an ass, new-roused from sleep.

 I stroked his nose and I tickled his ears,
 And spoke soft words to quiet his fears.

 His eyes stared into the eyes of me
 And he kissed my hands of his courtesy.

 "O big, brown brother out of the waste,
 How do thistles for breakfast taste?

 "And do you rejoice in the dawn divine
 With a heart that is glad no less than mine?

 "For, brother, the depth of your gentle eyes
 Is strange and mystic as the skies:

 "What are the thoughts that grope behind,
 Down in the mist of a donkey mind?

 "Can it be true, as the wise men tell,
 That you are a mask of God as well,

 "And, as in us, so in you no less
 Speaks the eternal Loveliness,

 "And words of the lips that all things know
 Among the thoughts of a donkey go?

 "However it be, O four-foot brother,
 Fair to-day is the earth, our mother.

 "God send you peace and delight thereof,
 And all green meat of the waste you love,

 "And guard you well from violent men
 Who'd put you back in the shafts again."

 But the ass had far too wise a head
 To answer one of the things I said,

 So he twitched his fair ears up and down
 And turned to nuzzle his shoulder brown.

XXVIII. Ballade Mystique

 The big, red-house is bare and lone
 The stony garden waste and sere
 With blight of breezes ocean blown
 To pinch the wakening of the year;
 My kindly friends with busy cheer
 My wretchedness could plainly show.
 They tell me I am lonely here--
 What do they know? What do they know?

 They think that while the gables moan
 And easements creak in winter drear
 I should be piteously alone
 Without the speech of comrades dear;
 And friendly for my sake they fear,
 It grieves them thinking of me so
 While all their happy life is near--
 What do they know? What do they know?

 That I have seen the Dagda's throne
 In sunny lands without a tear
 And found a forest all my own
 To ward with magic shield and spear,
 Where, through the stately towers I rear
 For my desire, around me go
 Immortal shapes of beauty clear:
 They do not know, they do not know.

 L'Envoi

 The friends I have without a peer
 Beyond the western ocean's glow,
 Whither the faerie galleys steer,
 They do not know: how should they know?

XXIX. Night

 I know a little Druid wood
 Where I would slumber if I could
 And have the murmuring of the stream
 To mingle with a midnight dream,
 And have the holy hazel trees
 To play above me in the breeze,
 And smell the thorny eglantine;
 For there the white owls all night long
 In the scented gloom divine
 Hear the wild, strange, tuneless song
 Of faerie voices, thin and high
 As the bat's unearthly cry,
 And the measure of their shoon
 Dancing, dancing, under the moon,
 Until, amid the pale of dawn
 The wandering stars begin to swoon. . . .
 Ah, leave the world and come away!

 The windy folk are in the glade,
 And men have seen their revels, laid
 In secret on some flowery lawn
 Underneath the beechen covers,
 Kings of old, I've heard them say,
 Here have found them faerie lovers
 That charmed them out of life and kissed
 Their lips with cold lips unafraid,
 And such a spell around them made
 That they have passed beyond the mist
 And found the Country-under-wave. . . .

 Kings of old, whom none could save!

XXX. Oxford

 It is well that there are palaces of peace
 And discipline and dreaming and desire,
 Lest we forget our heritage and cease
 The Spirit's work-to hunger and aspire:

 Lest we forget that we were born divine,
 Now tangled in red battle's animal net,
 Murder the work and lust the anodyne,
 Pains of the beast 'gainst bestial solace set.

 But this shall never be: to us remains
 One city that has nothing of the beast,
 That was not built for gross, material gains,
 Sharp, wolfish power or empire's glutted feast.

 We are not wholly brute. To us remains
 A clean, sweet city lulled by ancient streams,
 A place of visions and of loosening chains,
 A refuge of the elect, a tower of dreams.

 She was not builded out of common stone
 But out of all men's yearning and all prayer
 That she might live, eternally our own,
 The Spirit's stronghold-barred against despair.

XXXI. Hymn (For Boys' Voices)

 All the things magicians do
 Could be done by me and you
 Freely, if we only knew.

 Human children every day
 Could play at games the faeries play
 If they were but shown the way.

 Every man a God would be
 Laughing through eternity
 If as God's his eyes could see.

 All the wizardries of God--
 Slaying matter with a nod,
 Charming spirits with his rod,

 With the singing of his voice
 Making lonely lands rejoice,
 Leaving us no will nor choice,

 Drawing headlong me and you
 As the piping Orpheus drew
 Man and beast the mountains through,

 By the sweetness of his horn
 Calling us from lands forlorn
 Nearer to the widening morn--

 All that loveliness of power
 Could be man's peculiar dower,
 Even mine, this very hour;

 We should reach the Hidden Land
 And grow immortal out of hand,
 If we could but understand!

 We could revel day and night
 In all power and all delight
 If we learn to think aright.

XXXII. "Our Daily Bread"

 We need no barbarous words nor solemn spell
 To raise the unknown. It lies before our feet;
 There have been men who sank down into Hell
   In some suburban street,

 And some there are that in their daily walks
 Have met archangels fresh from sight of God,
 Or watched how in their beans and cabbage-stalks
   Long files of faerie trod.

 Often me too the Living voices call
 In many a vulgar and habitual place,
 I catch a sight of lands beyond the wall,
   I see a strange god's face.

 And some day this work will work upon me so
 I shall arise and leave both friends and home
 And over many lands a pilgrim go
   Through alien woods and foam,

 Seeking the last steep edges of the earth
 Whence I may leap into that gulf of light
 Wherein, before my narrowing Self had birth,
   Part of me lived aright.

XXXIII. How He Saw Angus the God

 I heard the swallow sing in the eaves and rose
 All in a strange delight while others slept,
 And down the creaking stair, alone, tip-toes,
   So carefully I crept.

 The house was dark with silly blinds yet drawn,
 But outside the clean air was filled with light,
 And underneath my feet the cold, wet lawn
   With dew was twinkling bright.

 The cobwebs hung from every branch and spray
 Gleaming with pearly strands of laden thread,
 And long and still the morning shadows lay
   Across the meadows spread.

 At that pure hour when yet no sound of man,
 Stirs in the whiteness of the wakening earth,
 Alone through innocent solitudes I ran
   Singing aloud for mirth.

 Till I had found the open mountain heath
 Yellow with gorse, and rested there and stood
 To gaze upon the misty sea beneath,
   Or on the neighbouring wood,

 --That little wood of hazel and tall pine
 And youngling fir, where oft we have loved to see
 The level beams of early morning shine
   Freshly from tree to tree.

 Through the denser wood there's many a pool
 Of deep and night-born shadow lingers yet
 Where the new-wakened flowers are damp and cool
   And the long grass is wet.

 In the sweet heather long I rested there
 Looking upon the dappled, early sky,
 When suddenly, from out the shining air
   A god came flashing by.

 Swift, naked, eager, pitilessly fair,
 With a live crown of birds about his head,
 Singing and fluttering, and his fiery hair,
   Far out behind him spread,

 Streamed like a rippling torch upon the breeze
 Of his own glorious swiftness: in the grass
 He bruised no feathery stalk, and through the trees
   I saw his whiteness pass.

 But when I followed him beyond the wood,
 Lo! He was changed into a solemn bull
 That there upon the open pasture stood
   And browsed his lazy full.

XXXIV. The Roads

 I stand on the windy uplands among the hills of Down
 With all the world spread out beneath, meadow and sea and town,
 And ploughlands on the far-off hills that glow with friendly brown.

 And ever across the rolling land to the far horizon line,
 Where the blue hills border the misty west, I see the white roads twine,
 The rare roads and the fair roads that call this heart of mine.

 I see them dip in the valleys and vanish and rise and bend
 From shadowy dell to windswept fell, and still to the West they wend,
 And over the cold blue ridge at last to the great world's uttermost end.

 And the call of the roads is upon me, a desire in my spirit has grown
 To wander forth in the highways, 'twixt earth and sky alone,
 And seek for the lands no foot has trod and the seas no sail has known:

 For the lands to the west of the evening and east of the morning's birth,
 Where the gods unseen in their valleys green are glad at the ends of the earth
 And fear no morrow to bring them sorrow, nor night to quench their mirth.

XXXV. Hesperus

 Through the starry hollow
 Of the summer night
 I would follow, follow
 Hesperus the bright,
 To seek beyond the western wave
 His garden of delight.

 Hesperus the fairest
 Of all gods that are,
 Peace and dreams thou bearest
 In thy shadowy car,
 And often in my evening walks
 I've blessed thee from afar.

 Stars without number,
 Dust the noon of night,
 Thou the early slumber
 And the still delight
 Of the gentle twilit hours
 Rulest in thy right.

 When the pale skies shiver,
 Seeing night is done,
 Past the ocean-river,
 Lightly thou dost run,
 To look for pleasant, sleepy lands,
 That never fear the sun.

 Where, beyond the waters
 Of the outer sea,
 Thy triple crown of daughters
 That guards the golden tree
 Sing out across the lonely tide
 A welcome home to thee.

 And while the old, old dragon
 For joy lifts up his head,
 They bring thee forth a flagon
 Of nectar foaming red,
 And underneath the drowsy trees
 Of poppies strew thy bed.

 Ah! that I could follow
 In thy footsteps bright,
 Through the starry hollow
 Of the summer night,
 Sloping down the western ways
 To find my heart's delight!

XXXVI. The Star Bath

 A place uplifted towards the midnight sky
 Far, far away among the mountains old,
 A treeless waste of rocks and freezing cold,
 Where the dead, cheerless moon rode neighbouring by--
 And in the midst a silent tarn there lay,
 A narrow pool, cold as the tide that flows
 Where monstrous bergs beyond Varanger stray,
 Rising from sunless depths that no man knows;
 Thither as clustering fireflies have I seen
 At fixed seasons all the stars come down
 To wash in that cold wave their brightness clean
 And win the special fire wherewith they crown
 The wintry heavens in frost. Even as a flock
 Of falling birds, down to the pool they came.
 I saw them and I heard the icy shock
 Of stars engulfed with hissing of faint flame--
 Ages ago before the birth of men
 Or earliest beast. Yet I was still the same
 That now remember, knowing not where or when.

XXXVII. Tu Ne Quaesieris

 For all the lore of Lodge and Myers
 I cannot heal my torn desires,
 Nor hope for all that man can speer
 To make the riddling earth grow clear.
 Though it were sure and proven well
 That I shall prosper, as they tell,
 In fields beneath a different sun
 By shores where other oceans run,
 When this live body that was I
 Lies hidden from the cheerful sky,
 Yet what were endless lives to me
 If still my narrow self I be
 And hope and fail and struggle still,
 And break my will against God's will,
 To play for stakes of pleasure and pain
 And hope and fail and hope again,
 Deluded, thwarted, striving elf
 That through the window of my self
 As through a dark glass scarce can see
 A warped and masked reality?
 But when this searching thought of mine
 Is mingled in the large Divine,
 And laughter that was in my mouth
 Runs through the breezes of the South,
 When glory I have built in dreams
 Along some fiery sunset gleams,
 And my dead sin and foolishness
 Grow one with Nature's whole distress,
 To perfect being I shall win,
 And where I end will Life begin.

XXXVIII. Lullaby

 Lullaby! Lullaby!
 There's a tower strong and high
 Built of oak and brick and stone,
 Stands before a wood alone.
 The doors are of the oak so brown
 As any ale in Oxford town,
 The walls are builded warm and thick
 Of the old red Roman brick,
 The good grey stone is over all
 In arch and floor of the tower tall.
 And maidens three are living there
 All in the upper chamber fair,
 Hung with silver, hung with pall,
 And stories painted on the wall.
 And softly goes the whirring loom
 In my ladies' upper room,
 For they shall spin both night and day
 Until the stars do pass away.
 But every night at evening.
 The window open wide they fling,
 And one of them says a word they know
 And out as three white swans they go,
 And the murmuring of the woods is drowned
 In the soft wings' whirring sound,
 As they go flying round, around,
 Singing in swans' voices high
 A lonely, lovely lullaby.

XXXIX. World's Desire

 Love, there is a castle built in a country desolate,
 On a rock above a forest where the trees are grim and great,
 Blasted with the lightning sharp-giant boulders strewn between,
 And the mountains rise above, and the cold ravine
 Echoes to the crushing roar and thunder of a mighty river
 Raging down a cataract. Very tower and forest quiver
 And the grey wolves are afraid and the call of birds is drowned,
 And the thought and speech of man in the boiling water's sound.
 But upon the further side of the barren, sharp ravine
 With the sunlight on its turrets is the castle seen,
 Calm and very wonderful, white above the green
 Of the wet and waving forest, slanted all away,
 Because the driving Northern wind will not rest by night or day.
 Yet the towers are sure above, very mighty is the stead,
 The gates are made of ivory, the roofs of copper red.

 Round and round the warders grave walk upon the walls for ever
 And the wakeful dragons couch in the ports of ivory,
 Nothing is can trouble it, hate of the gods nor man's endeavour,
 And it shall be a resting-place, dear heart, for you and me.

 Through the wet and waving forest with an age-old sorrow laden
 Singing of the world's regret wanders wild the faerie maiden,
 Through the thistle and the brier, through the tangles of the thorn,
 Till her eyes be dim with weeping and her homeless feet are torn.

 Often to the castle gate up she looks with vain endeavour,
 For her soulless loveliness to the castle winneth never.

 But within the sacred court, hidden high upon the mountain,
 Wandering in the castle gardens lovely folk enough there be,
 Breathing in another air, drinking of a purer fountain
 And among that folk, beloved, there's a place for you and me.

XL. Death in Battle

 Open the gates for me,
 Open the gates of the peaceful castle, rosy in the West,
 In the sweet dim Isle of Apples over the wide sea's breast,

 Open the gates for me!

 Sorely pressed have I been
 And driven and hurt beyond bearing this summer day,
 But the heat and the pain together suddenly fall away,
 All's cool and green.

 But a moment agone,
 Among men cursing in fight and toiling, blinded I fought,
 But the labour passed on a sudden even as a passing thought,

 And now-alone!

 Ah, to be ever alone,
 In flowery valleys among the mountains and silent wastes untrod,
 In the dewy upland places, in the garden of God,
 This would atone!

 I shall not see
 The brutal, crowded faces around me, that in their toil have grown
 Into the faces of devils-yea, even as my own--
 When I find thee,

 O Country of Dreams!
 Beyond the tide of the ocean, hidden and sunk away,
 Out of the sound of battles, near to the end of day,
 Full of dim woods and streams.

End of # Spirits in Bondage, by (AKA Clive Hamilton) C. S. Lewis

*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SPIRITS IN BONDAGE ***

***** This file should be named 2003.txt or 2003.zip ***** This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: http://www.gutenberg.org/2/0/0/2003/

Produced by An Anonymous Volunteer

Spirits in Bondage, by (AKA Clive Hamilton) C. S. Lewis has loaded